Live from the Staples parking lot

Hey, hey!  It’s Monday and we’re all in misery.  Well, not everyone.  I woke up at 10:30 this morning and moved directly to about three hours of coffee/Seinfeld time.

Jerry:  Why would a junior high want to screw with my head?

Kramer:  Why does Radio Shack ask for your phone number when you buy batteries?

 

Coors Light and Jailbait

Went bowling on Saturday night.  The Saturday night crowd at Tahoe Bowl is interesting…at best.  Lots of kiddies.  Of course, pursuant to Megan’s Law, I maintained 50 yards separation.

Rolled three games.  170 (with a 7,8,9 Turkey), 79, and 134.  Not exactly sure but I’m pretty sure the 170 is a personal record.

 

KK

Last week’s Us Weekly included a little story called “25 Random Things About Kim Kardashian”.  An excerpt:

18.  I’m obsessed with my blog and I update it a few times a day.

Who the fuck does she think she is?  A few times a day?  Fuck you Kim.  You think you’re so much better than me?

 

Zack and Miri

To those who haven’t seen Zack and Miri Make a Porno, I highly recommend it.  Saw it last night…literally laughed like a schoolgirl.  Revenge of the Shit.  Wow.  Perfect delivery.

 

Communication Breakdown

My phone stopped working Saturday night.  Not sure what kind of radiation they’re pumping out at Tahoe Bowl but three working phones went in and only one came out.  Fucked up shit.

So yesterday morning I departed to Carson City for the Verizon store.  Thirty minute drive down and thirty minute wait only to find out I had to head to a store in Reno to get a replacement phone.  Another thirty minute drive and thirty minute wait.  It then took the woman another thirty minutes to swap out phone. 

Decided to take the scenic route back to South Lake…Mt. Rose Highway to Route 28 around the east of the lake.  Aside from the white-out conditions crossing the Mt. Rose summit, a pretty nice drive.  Cruising down 28 on a Sunday afternoon along with Stevie Wonder and Elton John…good times.

The entire ordeal took me four and a half hours.  Good thing I don’t have anything to do.

 

Days of Our Lives

Well folks…I’ve been at this for a while now…here are the exact numbers.

Number of days since I’ve…

…worn a watch – 52

…been to a strip club – 53

…been to a strip club alone – 53

…worn a mustache – 56

…worked – 73

…owned a bed – 79

…eaten at Arby’s – 113

…worn a banana costume – 115

 

A few songs I really, really like…

“Lovers in Japan / Reign of Love” by Coldplay

“End of the Line” by The Traveling Wilburys

“Touch of Grey” by Grateful Dead

“Ruby Tuesday” by The Rolling Stones

“Cracklin’ Rosie” by Neil Diamond